3 Things Not To Do Before You Get Married

May 5, 2016 at 9:00 am

no sex

When dating in route to getting married, there are things you should do and things you should not do. Quite naturally, if you go in with the mindset that you are confident in yourself and that you’re not going to casual date, you’re starting off on the right track. One thing we should all agree on is that the 1 exists, although you might encounter some roadblocks along the way. However, there are some things we should talk about as far as what not to do before you get married.


1.) Don’t Allow Pressures of Others Make You Settle

Of course no one thinks that they will settle. However, after being asked a million times when are you going to get married, why aren’t you married yet, what’s taking so long, why are you so picky, etc; it could get you to the point where you’re simply tired. You might suddenly find yourself entertaining individuals that you know you would not normally entertain. That subtle pressure from friends or that “biological clock” could cause you to begin to do things you know you shouldn’t.


I’m sure many of you have had friends or family who have tried to convince you to stay with someone or to date someone who you simply knew was not it. You typically handle it well, but overtime, it could weigh on you if you’re not careful. Some people want you married so badly until they’re blinded and give bad advice! Don’t fall prey to pressure b/c you will meet the right 1! They might mean well, but it doesn’t mean they know what’s best in that situation. They won’t be the one making the marriage vows, so don’t cave into the pressure.


2.) Don’t Have Sex

Obviously as a Christian, this is obvious b/c it’s what God wants. However, I don’t think everyone knows the true impact when this happens. If it’s already happened in the past, it’s in the past. I’m talking about moving forward. It doesn’t matter if you think or feel they are the 1. Don’t have sex until you’re married.


Soul ties are very real. You can be trying to move forward but still attached to an ex. It’s hard to move on if you’re still holding on to yesterday! You can even feel like you’ve move on, but that person can still be a part of you b/c of what was deposited in your soul. Those soul ties must be broken in Jesus name.


It’s never just sex. There is always far more attached to it b/c contrary to what some may believe, sex is more of a spiritual act than it is physical. It’s an act of coming into covenant with an individual. It’s like a soul marriage. Your soul is not physical, but it is spiritual. Your spirit and soul can’t be seen, but your flesh can. Although the sexual act begins in the natural, it connects you in more ways. It attaches to your soul. So, you need to divorce yourself in the spirit from anyone you may have had sex with in the past along with any demons who gained access because of it.


The enemy uses it to steal from you and attack you. They look for any open door. This is why although you may have repented from your sins, it doesn’t break the soul tie. It got you back in right standing with God, but demons know they have a legal right to get to you b/c of that sin. So, don’t just repent, but also break that demonic legal right in Jesus name. Command them to leave in Jesus name.


This is why our souls must constantly be cleansed. Scripture talks about renewing our mind (Romans 12:2). Your mind is a part of your soul. So, we must ask God daily to renew our soul, and we renew it with His Word, prayer and sending the blood of Jesus and power of God into our souls.


3.) Don’t Alter Your Personal Goals

I have had far too many conversations with women who are not pursuing certain things in their career, making certain moves, etc. b/c they are trying to wait until they’re married. Don’t alter your goals before you get married. You adjust then not before. Don’t put aspects of your life on pause b/c you’re waiting for marriage! God gave you a vision for now! The other pieces will fall in place! God has a vision for you as a single and for you when married. Complete this assignment first.


If you keep putting things off waiting until tomorrow, you might miss today. Not only that, but as you are pursuing what God placed in you, there are many blessings you will encounter on the way that you would have missed if you stayed in one spot. Continue to march forward.


In the meantime, know that you will get married. It doesn’t matter what anyone else has to say about it b/c you will get married to the right 1. Keep loving forward. Keep going and keep fighting. Before you know it, marriage will be at your door!


As always, remember that you are Single For 1! That is all for now.

Your Relationship Advisor,

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