Give Me Your Love Or Give Me Nothing

December 1, 2016 at 9:00 am

All or Nothing concept on the road signpost, 3D rendering

When it comes to dating and relationships, there is no time for all the gray area. There is no time for all the what ifs and trying to figure out what the other person is thinking or feeling. If you have to guess how they really feel about you then the foundation of the relationship is not solid. At the end of the day, you need to pray and see if they are the 1 or not. Even in knowing they’re the 1, there is still work that must be done on both sides.

 

Some spend too much time in relationships or what they think is a relationship making excuses about the person they’re with as to why they’re not giving the love they so very much deserve. Just because they treat you nice doesn’t mean that’s enough. The cashier at the grocery store treats you nice. Nice is a prerequisite. So, stop giving all this credit for what is supposed to be done.

 

What you need is real love. You need God’s love coming through the right 1. Accepting anything else is honestly a waste of your time. Too many are calling feelings love. They may have strong feelings for you, but after a reasonable period of time, the love should be real. Also, just because they say they love you doesn’t mean they’re the 1 either.

 

What I’m focusing on in this post is the fact that too many are accepting less than love. If you have been with someone for years and they have still not made a real commitment, you’re wasting time. You’re allowing them to waste your time. Yes, I said it. I’ve been saying it, but are you listening? It doesn’t matter how much you have invested in them. Are you ok with continuing to invest all you time, energy, resources and love in an investment that you’re not getting a good return on? Notice that I’m not even saying they are a bad person. It has nothing to do with good or bad.

 

When you settle, you’re saying that you’re willing to accept whatever the person does or does not do simply b/c you’re set on not leaving! You only tolerate what you’re willing to accept. What are you waiting around for? Is it for something to change? There is no pressure to change when they’re comfortable. Yes, anyone can change, but you certainly can’t make them. You can’t make them change, but you don’t have to deal with someone who doesn’t love you like you need to be loved. Notice that I didn’t even say that they don’t love you. That doesn’t change the facts on the table.

 

If they loved you like they said or like you thought, things would be different. If they are still trying to get things together after years of this relationship, they’re too comfortable. If you’re doing everything married people do, there is nothing left to get together. You need to cut off those marriage benefits immediately until marriage. Is it easier said than done the deeper you are into it? Yes. Can you still do it with the help of God? Yes.

 

If they can’t give you the love that you fully deserve then you shouldn’t want nothing at all. I’m not talking about when you are just getting to know someone obviously. I’m talking about as the relationship grows, there should be a build up towards loving one another. There should be obvious progress in the relationship.

 

You know when something is stagnant. You know when it seems like someone is going through the motions with no real intent on working towards a future. Holy Spirit will try to get your attention, but sometimes your feelings and emotions get too loud. Don’t get caught up in the fact that you might lose a relationship. You can’t lose what wasn’t supposed to be to begin with.

 

The real fight is the enemy trying to stop you from getting with the right 1 or staying with the right 1. The enemy can be very sneaky, but it’s not hard to see God’s hand in something when you’re in relationship with God. He will show you what you need to see if you ask Him to lead you in the relationship.

 

In the meantime, don’t settle for less than love, and when you get the love, don’t settle for just enough love. The right 1 should give you more than enough to where there are leftovers!

 

As always, remember that you are Single For 1! That is all for now.

Your Relationship Advisor,

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